Ruth

I have read the book of Ruth so many times. I've read about how she left with her mother in law Naomi, how they travelled to a strange land after Ruth's husband, father in law, and brother in law had all died. I've read about how she left all of her family behind, how her sister in law turned back to go be with her own family. I've read about how Ruth went out to gather wheat to feed her mother in law and herself.

If you don't know the story well, basically what happens is that Ruth ends up in the field of a close relative of her deceased husband. She eventually asks Boaz, the close relative, to be her kinsman redeemer, a tradition at the time which required the closest male relative available to marry the widow and give her a child, which would actually be considered the child of the deceased husband.

This week when I read the story again, it hit me in a new way. I found myself picking up on things I had never noticed before.

I also have come across several articles in the last few weeks with very similar themes to those I have been seeing for the first time in the book of Ruth.

I have had an ongoing conversation with 2 good friends lately about how what we watch and read influences what we think about romantic relationships. The first article that addressed this topic was this article. Is it really helpful to watch and read stories about women being swept off their feet by heros with bulging biceps and living happily ever after? Is that really how it generally happens in real life? Is the hero always going to be perfect in every way? Is it all just chance? Is it really realistic to think that once he waltzes into my life, and I into his, that we will all of a sudden become perfect for each other? Or do those character traits develop over time from life experiences, self-control, good mentors? And the biggest question I and many of my single friends ask, how do I live fully here and now in this life that God has ordained for me as a single woman, when culture, both popular and Christian, constantly tells me that I am somehow lacking, somehow incomplete because I don't have a man and am not riding of into the sunset happily ever after? Or as some of my friends say, poking fun at the wealth of Christian romance novels they have read (yes it's true those do exist) where is the man that they will ride of in a wagon heading west with?

One of the things that really jumped out at me about Ruth this week was the way she was described by others, specifically her mother in law and also her eventual husband Boaz.

In Ruth 3:11 after Ruth has done what her mother in law told her to do and gone and laid on the threshing floor with Boaz, he says this "And now, my daughter, do not fear. I will do for you all that you ask, for all my fellow townsmen know that you are a worthy woman."
In several commentaries and study guides this week I learned that that actual Hebrew word used here is Hah-yil, which means strength. This was the same term used to describe heros of the Bible, mighty men of valor. I think it also interesting to note that in several commentaries on this section of Ruth, she is compared to or described as the Proverbs 31 woman.

Last night I read this article by Donald Miller about how to prepare to be a good wife in today's culture. It is interesting to note that one of the things that Boaz notes about Ruth's character is that she showed self-control, not running of with whatever man showed interest in her. He says it like this.

Ruth 3:10 And he said, "May you be blessed by the LORD, my daughter. You have made this last kindness greater than the first in that you have not gone after young men, whether poor or rich.

Donald Miller basically says don't hook up with random guys, and weed out the losers. I think essentially Boaz and Mr. Miller are saying the same thing.

Boaz was no slouch either in the character department. After the first day that Ruth gleaned wheat in Boaz's field, her mother in law had this to say about him:

And Naomi said to her daughter-in-law, "May he be blessed by the LORD, whose kindness has not forsaken the living or the dead!" Ruth 2:20

Then again after Ruth had returned from the threshing floor, her mother in law Naomi had kind things to say about Boaz. In Ruth 3:18 she says this:

She replied, "Wait, my daughter, until you learn how the matter turns out, for the man will not rest but will settle the matter today."

I had never picked up on the great character of Boaz before. He was a man who showed great kindness, and also a man whose word could be trusted.

As I read through the story this week, I was also struck by the ways Boaz repeatedly provided for Ruth and protected her, giving her ample food and telling her to stay with the women in his household where she would be safe.

I can't think of character traits that I would want more in my future husband than kindness, trustworthiness, and the ability to provide for and protect me.

I have been thinking about the great hopelessness that Ruth must have felt based on the circumstances she found herself in, and the joy it must have been to her when Boaz became her husband. And as I thought about all of that, I was filled with great hope, and reminded to ignore the messages that are fed to me constantly about relationships, and character. As one author I read recently described it, I need to ignore the romantic pornography.