Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Rest

Just over a year ago my parents came down, collected me, and made me take an actual vacation. We went to Branson. I was so wound up that I had a hard time relaxing. I take after my dad a lot in this area but also there had been so much stress in my life that I just couldn't even laugh really.

I know that I have a tendency to be a workaholic. Part of that is my personality and upbringing, and part of that is my job description.

One thing I have really struggled with as a single woman is what to do with time off. Lots of my vacation time is taken up visiting family who live far away. While I love visiting them, it's not really rest and vacation.

Married friends, with or without kids, tend to take trips together to fun places just to enjoy each other, the sights, and relax.

Maybe because I am just naturally a fairly social individual, or maybe because I am insecure about my singleness in a few sets of circumstances, I have forgone actual vacation to fun, exciting, and relaxing destinations to do things I like to do.

The one exception is that my brother has a tendency, due to the nature of his job, to always be living near a beach, so visiting him is like a vacation.

Several weeks ago, maybe even over a month ago, I was asked if I wanted to take a trip for work over spring break.
I immediately agreed.

Then I spent the next week wondering if that was a good idea.

There was lots of stuff that I really need to get done at my house that has been neglected during basketball season.

It would be really nice to spend the week folding laundry and vacuuming, I thought.

I could go out to LBL and hike a little by myself, enjoy some quiet time.

I really needed to get back into a regular workout schedule, not that I hadn't been working out, I had, my workouts had just been incredibly varied and inconsistent in content.

But I had committed, and the trip did involve the beach. I knew that I would be working, some, but the thought of waking up early to watch the sunrise was exciting to me.

And so just a week after getting back from the last basketball trip of the season, I packed my bags and loaded up to head out on a trip with another team.

Before leaving I emailed a Master's swim team in one of the places we would be to see if I could swim with them, and low and behold, they were excited to have me join them at 5:30 in the mornings!

And I am grateful that I agreed to what was God's plan to force me into some rest, and laughter, and sun, and sand, and excessive picture taking.

Before we were even out of the state of Kentucky there was much laughter going on.

God's loving hand has been written all over this trip for me from the first morning, when the hotel desk person recommended this path for a quiet peaceful run.

One thing that has been different about this trip, when compared with trips I normally go on for work, is that this team likes to eat food that I like to eat. They are all about some California Pizza kitchen, and good organic salads, and smoothies with ginseng. I have really enjoyed that.

The second place we went was to one of my favorite cities in the south, and again an awesome run, this time through an unbelievably beautiful campus and down a well maintained city running and biking path that was busy, but again great.

It was about this time that I realized, unlike most trips, there wasn't going to be a moment when a caterer didn't show up on time, or a hotel messed something up, and I was going to have to deal with the high stress situation, because I am not in charge of any of that for this team.

The next stop landed us, in large part due to the extreme generosity of some parents, on Hilton Head Island.

These were taken from the roof of our condo building.

While I have had to work some, we have also gotten to play a bunch too.

I swam two morning with a group of master's swimmers.
I ran on the beach one morning for about 4.5 miles.

We road bikes into the sunset one evening.


We took a boat ride.

We ate dinner outside at twilight, twice.


I sat in a rocking chair talking with some old men about life as the team was practicing.

I have eaten all of the seafoods that I love.

And I ran some more. In fact I have worked out so much, because it's been so beautiful, and because to me, there is no better time to spend with the Lord than running or swimming as I pray, that I have had to do laundry, twice. Oh and yes there was free washer and dryer, no need for quarters, another gift.

I have had many quiet times with the Lord, reading His Word, and wondering at His creation.

I was talking to my dad on the phone and he said "I'm glad you are having such a great time. You deserve it."
While I don't think I necessarily deserve all the blessing that this week has been, I definitely am grateful to a loving God, who has in a sense reached down His arms and embraced me and kissed me on the forehead, and whispered in my ear to go ahead and rest this week.

I was reading the book I have been reading for a couple weeks now this afternoon. I was sitting out on the deck of one of the rooms, intermittently reading, napping, and basking in the sun. When I read this quote:

"Years of Christian discipleship, Bible study, churchgoing had been about me thinking about God; practicing eucharisteo (thanksgiving) was the very first I had really considered at length what God thought of me -- this ridiculous and relentlessly pursuing love, so bold. Everywhere, everything, Love!"

It's Ann Voskamp, yes the same author and book that inspired me to start listing things I'm thankful for. To be totally honest, I think I might have overlooked some of the blessings this trip has been, had I not been constantly adding the the running list I have going on my iphone. For example, there is a heated lamp thing in the bathroom, so when you get out of the shower, it's warm. Small and seemingly insignificant, but none the less a blessing.

As I was half napping, have reading, I came to this section in the book:
"He chooses His children to fully live! Fully live the fullest life: the astonished gratitude, the awed joy, the flying and the free. The discipline of giving thanks, of unwrapping one thousand gifts, unwraps God's heart bare: I choose you. Live!"

My friend sent me a message this week. She told me she had made plans to go on a trip, that she was really enjoying the freedom that she has to do that. I thought, you know what, she is starting to fully live, single or not. Am I? Or am I sitting here waiting for God to show up, all the while He is right there, I just haven't taken the time to notice?

Am I willing to embrace this full life that He is given me? And by full life, I don't just mean the good times when I am laying out enjoying the smell of the ocean on the breeze and my hair is curling nicely and in a uniform manner. I mean the bad times too, when I am frustrated, or hurt, or disappointed, because He is there too.

I finished reading today with this: "I can't simply ignore his serenade because I'm unsure, uncomfortable, uninterested, thinking I've claimed Christ as my Savior already anyways. God is relationship and He woos us to relationship and there is nothing with God if there is no relationship."

I want that relationship, not that I don't or haven't had it before, but like any relationship, you have to grow, you can't just stay where you are. I want to grow in my relationship with Christ, I want to fully live, not just when I'm running on the beach, but when I'm at home too, folding laundry and vacuuming.

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