Here is the truth.
As much fun as I've had catching up with friends, eating at my cousin's restaurant, enjoying family...
the last 4 weeks have been extremely hard as well.
No matter how much you prepare yourself, when faced with watching someone you love slowly die, you can never fully prepare.
Every time I've seen Nana for about the last 3 years, I've worried that it would be the last.  Every time my brother saw her, he would tell me I needed to come home soon to see her again.
When I arrived on Memorial Day, I was not prepared for Nana to call me Marcia.
I was prepared to start switching off with my Aunt spending time with her to give my Aunt a break.
I wasn't prepared that I would be the one to feed her the last thing she ate (coffee brandy ice cream from sully's) and for her to literally fall asleep between bites.
I wasn't prepared to have to tell my older brother that if he wanted to say goodbye, he needed to come immediately.
I wasn't prepared to take my older brother to see Nana, having been there just 2 days earlier and see the dramatic change as she wasted away.
I wasn't prepared to have to tell my younger brother that there was no way we would be able to set up skype and to hold the phone up near her head so he could say goodbye from California.
I wasn't prepared to have to call my parents and tell them not to drive back to Michigan from my Dad's boarding school reunion.
I wasn't prepared to have to interview for a job I really wanted and worry the whole time that I was missing phone calls telling me I needed to come back immediately.  Fortunately God is sovereign and that is actually the job I ended up taking, there is no telling how ridiculously distracted I was throughout the 6 ish hour process.  I used cruise control the whole way home so that I wouldn't speed, can't afford a ticket right now.

I wasn't prepared to be waiting for a phone call for a job offer for that job I really wanted, and a phone call saying Nana had taken her last breath on the same day.

I was prepared that Nana would die sometime in the first 6 months I was in New England, I wasn't prepared that it would happen before I had even moved my stuff up from Kentucky.

I wasn't prepared for the length of time it took from Nana having nothing by mouth, to her actually passing away.

I wasn't prepared to be on the phone looking for a new apartment in the morning, and standing with  my family waiting for the funeral home guy to come the same afternoon.

It's during times like this that I am reminded that God gives us friends to be His hands and feet.
There is the friend I sent a late Saturday night message saying "hey I'm coming to your church tomorrow, where and what time is the service?" and who hugged me hard and let me cry when I burst into tears the moment I saw her, not knowing what on earth was going on.
She is the same friend who said "let me lend you my juicer so you have something familiar to you in all the chaos."
Her husband, the pastor, asked questions to make sure I had the spiritual support I needed being somewhere that I don't have a church family and made sure that I had their phone numbers so that he could be there if I needed them.
Then there was the friend, who said "yes the house is crowded with all your family crammed in waiting, come crash at my house."
That same friend and her husband danced around the kitchen as I got the phone call with the job offer and I felt like I was going to pass out.  For all that my family is really excited, I don't know that they would have been able to dance around in unhindered celebration like my friends did.

There are the friends, fully aware of all that was going on and sent text messages saying "I'm praying about all this."

There are the friends who just sat there and listened, and kept filling my cup.
There is the friend who is taking care of her ailing grandfather and could relate.

I know God's timing is perfect, I recognize that had this all happened even a few weeks from now, I would not have been able to have the time available to be here the way my Aunt needed, to sit with Nana and feed her, to do the laundry and run the dishwasher, to make sure my Uncle got the meals he needed while she sat with Nana.  My Uncle is on an extremely strict diet due to his severe health crisis almost 2 years ago.

I wouldn't want it any other way than how it happened, however it has been an extreme emotional roller coaster. 

A Few Good Men

I wrote this post about a week ago, then Nana's condition deteriorated quite rapidly.  She passed away this week and in the midst of it all I didn't post this.  But as I am revisiting it tonight, it still makes me smile, so I'm posting it anyway.

When I was visiting my friends in Pennsylvania on my drive up to New England, my friend Mike accidentally let it slip that he had arranged for his sister in law to come down and take care of the kids while he took his wife away for the upcoming weekend for their anniversary.  It was awesome to see her reaction when she realized what he had done.

While I was riding around with my cousin, she was bragging about how her husband always makes sure her gas tank is filled up.  Then she decided to stop and get some gas and didn't know which side of the car her tank is on, because, umm, well she rarely actually has to put gas in her car.

Last weekend while I was a hanging out with a friend, her husband was away at a men's retreat.  He texted her to say that he had been really thinking about some things he needed to do to be a better husband and father and leader of their family.  Later he called to pray with her before they went to bed.

About a year ago I wrote about how much man bashing bothers me.  
I actually went on a personal campaign to be encourager to the single men in my life.  It was quite funny to see the intial responses when I would send a message that said "hey I really appreciate the way you..." followed by something specific.
At first several of them didn't know how to take it.  "What do you need?"  was often the response.
"Nothing, I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate your pursuit of Godly character."
"Oh"

Lately I have been incredibly encouraged by the Godly men several friends have married, and reminded that there are good men out there.

But here's the other part of the story, I have been AMAZED as my friends have bragged on their husbands, and as I have watched them interact with their husbands.

When I say brag, I don't mean inocuous statements like "Steve is a great husband, I love how he loves our kids."  I mean specifics, "I really appreciate Steve's commitment to study God's Word and pray with us as a family regularly"

My friends are not perfect, and neither are their husbands.  But I definitely appreciate their commitment to love, honor, protect, lead their wives and families.  And I definitely appreciate the wives commitment to serve, encourage, respect their husbands.

I love that they are honest about marriage, that they admit that it's not always easy.  But I also love that they don't bash their husbands, and are quick to point out the great things about their husband's character.

It definitely gives this single girl hope.

Romans 8:28 in real life

There are few times in my life where I have been this overwhelmed with God's faithfulness.  Yesterday I accepted a new job offer.  For just over a year I prayed, and others joined me.

I prayed that it would be within a 2 hour radius of my Aunt's house and close to other friends and family as well...
It's exactly 2 hours from my Aunt's house, the only place it's over 2 hours from is Arwen, and it's still not that far.

I prayed for a fall and spring sport assignment instead of a winter sport assignment so I would be able to be with family for Thanksgiving and Christmas, and also able to occasionally go up to the Christian camp which is dear to my heart for Snow Camps.
I was given a fall/spring sport assignment.

I prayed for a boss committed to life balance...
The first thing I was asked about during both my phone and face to face interview was how I achieved good life/ work balance because that is very important to them.

I prayed that God would meet my financial need, and that I wouldn't have to pull back from supporting friends in full-time ministry...
He answered this request in abundance.

I prayed for a location where there would be several decent churches to consider attending, in New England this is no small thing...
There are several on the list to check out.

I prayed for female coworkers...
I will have several.

I prayed for an opportunity to remain involved educating the next generation of athletic trainers...
I will be working at a school with a large, highly respected undergraduate athletic training program.

Then there are the things I didn't pray for...
A mountain with a running trail RIGHT NEXT TO CAMPUS
Being smack dab in between Boston and New York City
A start date that leaves me transitioning from one job to the next without any lapse in pay
Reimbursement for relocation costs
Amazing opportunities for continuing education...

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

Riding Around in Cars: Mom Friends and the Single Girl

Disclaimer: After posting this, I received much feedback, mostly from friends, some with kids, some without, who loved it, wanted to share it with their mom's group, etc... and a very small few who thought I was specifically talking about them or their group of friends. The reality is that I had no one specific in mind when I wrote this post other than the amazing mom friends I am thankful to have in my life. They are women from all sorts of walks of life, some work, some don't, some are planning on homeschooling, some are former public school teachers who aren't sure how they are going to educate their kids yet, some are family, some are college friends. I respect and value them all. I had recently read a blog post by a woman who was lamenting that after her recent marriage, her single friends had faded from her life. I commented that while it's true many single friends feel very awkward after their friends get married, she might consider whether or not she had stopped calling, returning phone calls, whether she was too busy every time they asked to get together etc... with her single friends. She hadn't thought of that and responded that it was true, she had stopped. Out of that and three days in a row of mom friends asking me to sit in the car with their kids, came this post. This is not in anyway a commentary on what makes a good mom or how people should or shouldn't raise their children

I've figured it out.
All my mom friends really want is to have someone sit in the car with their kids while they run into the store for a few quick things.

And that is fine with me.
That's when we take the crazy face photos.

Meanwhile their mom's run inside to grab a coffee, or snacks for Bible study tonight.

It's been an interesting ride with some moms in my life.
Some treated me like my singleness was a disease they might catch.Those were the mom friends who acted like they had it all together, wouldn't admit that life was hard, and were too proud to say "hey I just really want to order coffee without my kids screaming about donuts."  Those people aren't friends anymore.  I learned that those friendships were friendships of convenience, and it just wasn't convenient for them anymore.

Some said "yes I'd love to spend time with you, want to come over and help me take my kids to the park? I really need them to run around but am a little overwhelmed and would love an extra set of hands"
And I said "yes I'd love to."
And then they asked "hey would you mind if we stopped at Dunkin Donuts and I ran inside while you stayed with the kids?"
And I said "yes I'd love to."
And they said "hey do you want anything?"
And I said no "I grabbed my coffee on the way over, take your time, bask in the moment, read the whole menu if you want."

Memo to the mom friends, singleness is not a disease, you can't catch it, but your single friends would probably love to help you get the kids into their car seats, and sit in the car while you run in to grab 3 items at the grocery store, just for the opportunity to hang out with the friends they love, even though those friends are married and have kids.

I've been spending a bunch of time with mom friends lately, which means their kids have been telling me all the family secrets while they ran into the store.

Yesterday I learned that my cousin's husband poops.  I mean I think I kind of, sort of knew that, but it was confirmed for me, while mom was in the store.

Want a litmus test mom friends?  Here it is, if you are no longer friends with, or haven't seen your single friends in ages, stop to take a moment and think about why?  Did you start telling them that you had a problem with your their singleness?  Did you tell them you were too busy having play dates with all your mom friends?  Did you forget how to talk about anything but poop, potty training, and freezer cooking?

I've heard a million times about how "single people are selfish" or "single people just don't understand" or "single people ..." fill in the blank, basically we are terrible moody selfish people.  To be honest, that is true of some single people.  But the rest of us would love to sit in the car with your kids if you would just give us the chance, just for an opportunity to serve you and to talk with you, and spend time with you.

I am so thankful for the mom friends who have been willing to take the time to remain friends, and who haven't become so wrapped up in being a mom that they have lost sight of who God created them to be.  Being a mom does change you, that is true, but it doesn't mean you have to cut out all the people who aren't at that stage of life.  God didn't call you to be a mom, He called you to be a godly woman, no matter what stage of life you are in.  Those people who aren't in the same stage of life as you might in fact enrich your life, if you would let them.  And you and your kids have the opportunity to enrich their lives, if you would just take it.

Rally the troops, she is living a good story!

Sometimes I think my spiritual gifts include story collecting.
Anyway this isn't about me, I'm excited to tell you this story.
I've known my friend, for now we will call her MaeBob, since the summer of 2000, she was one of my bosses at the Christian camp we both worked at.
MaeBob was in her 30s at the time, and working toward a second degree in education.  She had a great desire to be a wife and a mom.  That hasn't happened in her life, until now, sort of.
MaeBob is an elementary school teacher, she has chosen to teach at a small Christian school, she makes very little money.  But she loves kids and sees her job as ministry, the way we all should.
Recently, through a series of events, only explainable by saying they were clearly orchestrated by God, MaeBob is in the process of becoming the guardian of an abandoned little girl.
MaeBob wasn't pursuing this, she wasn't trying to be a foster parent, she wasn't looking into adoption, she was approached by someone at her church, and she said yes.
She said yes to this little less than 2 yearold child, and she said "Yes God, I take Your Word seriously.  I will trust You."
On Monday when I heard about these events unfolding in my friend's life, I was so excited and overwhelmed I got a little teary eyed.  I've known MaeBob for 12 years, I know this isn't the way she imagined becoming a mom, but wow.
We don't know how long this little one will be in MaeBob's care, we don't know if MaeBob will be her forever family, or if this is for a season.
What I did know on Monday is that MaeBob's income is very small, this child came to her with nothing but the contents of her meager diaper bag.
When my friends have gotten married and had babies, we've thrown parties, showered them with the "things" they would "need" for the journey.  To be totally honest, anyone who knows me well knows that I'm not a huge shower fan, I think they tend to be extremely shallow and vain.
But this time I knew, I knew we had to do it and we had to do it fast.
So with the help of Arwen, and her sister Bethany we rallied the troops.  We decided an impromptu shower was not a good idea, it was necessary.
Arwen sent out a message to her church, which her sister in law Melissa sent to her MOPS group.
Can we just say "Holy Wow God's people, just WOW"
One woman in Mellisa's group is in the process of moving, she already had a pile of goods to get rid of, and this woman's children are adopted, she has a special place in her heart for orphans.  Other moms contributed too, expensive strollers, ride around toys, clothes, sippy cups.... IN 24 HOURS, 24 HOURS.
Friday night when we were hanging out with our friend Diane, who has many mutual friends of MaeBob's and we told her the story, she said hold on, walked upstairs to the room where her daughter was sleeping, and brought down some gifts, she said "here, I've never used these, add them to the gifts."
Our friend Lauren, who has never met MaeBob said, stop by on your way, I have a flexible flier tricycle.
Let me also just say that these are mostly women who don't know MaeBob, have never met her.
Bethany drove around and collected goods.  Arwen called MaeBob's house, which is more like a duplex where she lives on one side with her mom, and where her sister, brother in law and niece and nephew live on the other side.  We invited ourselves over on Saturday.  We decided that with all the changes going on in MaeBob's life, the last thing we wanted to do was make life complicated, and we had collected a ton of stuff.
I went and got flowers and cake, cut veggies and made dip.
And we showed up.

And bags of clothes were opened.

and we got to love on this adorable kid.

Arwen put her social working skills to good work, sifting through the paper work and explaining it to MaeBob so she fully understands it all.

MaeBob's BFF Karen showed up with some more stuff.

We sat around visiting and talking, and encouraging MaeBob.  She did admit wondering how on earth she was going to manage this, how was she going to afford it, how was she going to afford childcare while she goes to work.  We reminded her that she has a pretty big village, we will all be with her through this.

As we drove home, Arwen commented that this was the best gift giving experience of her life.  I couldn't agree more.  Way to go body of Christ, and keep it up.  Please please pray for MaeBob and little Miss.

running and praying

This week I was reminded, and I need reminding of this often, that sometimes the best thing isn't to try to fix people, or solve their problems, or come up with really fun things to do, and make them laugh.

Sometimes the best thing is to just sit and listen, ask questions, and encourage.  And then pray hard.

This week I had lunch with someone I've known since she was a 14 year-old 12 summers ago.  To say that life hasn't been the easiest, to say that the last year has been one of several really hard years would be a vast understatement.

To think that I have the answers, can fix her life, would be pathetic.  I am completely untrained and inadequate to attempt such.

Yesteray morning while I was out for a run, I was praying for her, and for Landon who is in a coma, and for other friends who are in the midst of hard times. 
I often joke that most of the "problems" we face day to day are first world problems.  For example "oh no I have to drink tap water and I only like filtered water" is a first world problem.

First world problems tend to crowd out the real issues in our lives, and the lives of those around us.  First world problems create busyness.  We spend so much time complaining that we only have starbucks coffee when really we love Dunkin Donuts coffee.  We fail to see the people right in front of us or around the globe who don't have acess to clean drinking water, or are struggling to feed their children, or are dealing the emotional baggage left from abuse as a child...

I think often in the busyness of life we loose sight of what is really important.  I sometimes have so many tasks on my long list that I fail to see the needs right in front of me.  Sometimes I am so exhausted from being busy that I have nothing left to give.  Now that I realize this, I know that I must make a conscious effort to avoid being in that place again.  How many opportunities to listen, encourage, share God's truth with people have I missed because I had so many tasks that I was trying to juggle that I failed to see? 

I had to the opportunity this week remind an amazing young woman that what is going on in her life right now isn't the end of her story, that we all have junk, that God has a way of taking the messes (whether we created them or not, much of her stuff wasn't in anyway natural consequences for choices she made) and weaving it all together for good.
I am not generally good at seeing those oppertunities, it was really God's grace and about choosing to really listen, to ask more questions, to say, you know what, life has thrown you a bunch of curve balls, but His story is the story of redemption.

Healing can be a slow and frustrating process, whether it's something superficial and temporary like a sprained ankle, or something less easy like chronic illness.  To be totally honest, I felt completely inept.
About a year ago a student athlete asked me why I love to run so much.  I said that I like to run because my time running is time with the Lord, it's time for me to ignore the long lists of tasks, and pray.
This week I am thankful for a little refocusing, for the reminder that sometimes the best thing you can do is really pray, that there are real needs all around me, and that I need to filter out the busyness and petty problems so that I don't miss them.

Hey, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!

While I was hanging out with Arwen on Monday, our good friend Katy called to say hi.  Katy has a very busy job and this is a very busy time of year for her.  I understand and can relate.  I had been wanting to hang out with her, but also aware that she didn't have much free time.

Tuesday morning when I woke up, I realized that it was her birthday, and that she was only an hour away, and I had to drive to Connecticut for an interview anyway, and even though Katy wasn't really on the way, she wasn't super out of the way either.

So I did what any good, crazy friend would do, I sent a Facebook message to her fiance telling him to call or text me.

A small side note, when you have lived really far away for 9 years, your good friends meet people and fall in love, and you don't really have a chance to get to know their future spouses.

Katy and Dan met in a most amazing way, that involved Katy's van catching fire when Katy and Dan were headed to the same retreat with their youth groups from their separate churches.  True story folks.

Anyway, Dan #2 called me, and said that yes it would be fine for me to stop by mid afternoon.

So after packing some stuff into my car, off I headed to the oldest fishing community in America.

I found Katy hard at work.

And I got to tell her happy birthday to her face.

And I got to see her hard at work, she is amazing

.

And I got to get to know her soon to be husband a little better.  It was awesome to see how proud of her he is.

It was time well spent.

At the end of the visit, I drove off, I passed this...

It's a monument to the men from Gloucester who served in the 1898 war against Spain.

And again I was reminded, there is history all around this area of the country.  And also that friends make time for their friends, go out of their way to encourage them, celebrate birthdays, maintain the relationships.  It's really not that hard, you just have to choose to do it.

History All Around

Arwen has been super busy at work, so busy in fact that she had accumulated a lot of comp time that she needed to take.
I have been busy doing a lot of family stuff.  Today she took some comp time, I'm on vacation.
We had been discussing what to do, normally we are up for a big adventure, whether it's a hiking trip, or a getting lost somewhere in Boston.
We weren't really up for a big adventure, we were up for a chill time together.
Recently we were discussing how many major historical sites are right around us, but because they are so close we overlook them.  I thought, instead of a big adventure, we should explore some of the closer things we have overlooked.  I checked into a various and assorted sites near my Auntie's house.

Today we drove just a couple miles to Lowell, MA where we went to the Boott Cotton Mills.

 There is a pretty cool National Park there.  I remember learning about the industrial revolution in history class growing up, I remember reading about mill girls.

Today we saw the actual mills where it all started here in America.  We saw the quarters where the mill girls lived.  We saw the looms actually working.

I know I can be a total nerd with my love for documentaries and all, but it was pretty awesome to go see where major changes in our society actually took place, where inventions that directly affected the way our society functions today were first used.

It was also pretty awesome to have a really chill day with my BFF.

Of course we went into some random shops.  After taking in pretty much all that we could with the cold rain, we went to REI because who doesn't love looking at camping, hiking, snow gear?
It was really great to just be, and to have some conversations that just can't be had over the phone, and to bask in the reality that we live in the same timezone now.

A weekend with the brother

One of the hard things of having lived in many different places, and having friends all over the world is that sometimes friends are hurting and they are far away.  That describes how I felt much of this weekend.  Friends back in Kentucky were sending me text messages as their niece's condition deteriorated after extensive injuries from a terrible car accident on Memorial day.  As I write this blog, they have prepared for the worst, while still hoping and praying for the best.  Please pray for them.

While my heart was heavy Friday I headed out to my brother's.

When I was driving up from Pennsylvania on Monday, I stopped in for a short visit.  I told my niece and nephew that I was planning on moving to live closer to them.  My nephew stated his opinion, "I think that's a good idea Auntie Cate."

Me too.

A quick hour and a half drive found me at my brother's right as he was getting home from picking his son up from school.  It was a low key evening that involved some awesome self portraits!

It was a weekend filled will lots of rain, and fun activities.

In the past most of the time when I am with my brother's family, there is much of the extended family around as well and so quality time together just doesn't happened.  This weekend was a different story.  My sister in law left for the weekend to be with her BFF who is going through a rough time, though it would have been great to get to spend time with her also, I'm glad she was able to go be with her friend.

Saturday was a full day even though it was pouring rain the whole day.  It was most definitely the kind of cold wet New England day that I have missed.

We found some awesome indoor activities! 

In typical New England fashion, Sunday's weather was a complete 180 with beautiful sun!  So of course we went hiking!  Really it was more of a walk in the woods, but hoping that the walk in the woods turns into hikes and backpacking trips as they get older.

 It's amazing to think about the fact that I've spent more time with my brother's family this week than I have in the last 2 years combined!

God's perfect timing

The Wednesday before the Thursday that I started driving to New England I had an interview in New Hampshire.  I flew up for the interview, on Tuesday, and then back on Wednesday.  Wednesday, before hoping on the plane, I met my aunt and uncle for a quicker than quick bite to eat.

My aunt told me that my Nana was going to start receiving hospice care.  Nothing had really drastically changed, she was just in a slow gradual decline.  She is 96 after all.  I didn't ask questions.

I didn't have time to really process it.  I hoped in my rental car, found my way back to the terminal, and hoped on a plane.  Thankfully there were no screaming children on the flight, I don't know if I could have handled that.  I sat on the plane wondering, what exactly does it mean that she is getting hospice care?  I work in health care, but I work with young people, and those young people I care about, but they aren't my family.


When I finally got to my Aunt's house on Monday, we were able to discuss further what exactly it means that my grandmother is in a slow gradual decline.  Basically I know now that all care given to my grandmother, and all procedures done will be to make her comfortable, no routine blood tests, no sticking her just because.

I was prepared to be unprepared when I saw her.  It had been a year since I had seen her in person.  We had skyped a few times, but that is different.

I hadn't been prepared for her to call me Marsha and ask about my nursing career.  She was referring to her niece, my dad's cousin, who is named Marsha and is a nurse.

Yesterday, while I was at another interview, my Aunt went to see Nana, and brought her pizza, pepperoni, her favorite.

Today I stopped by to see Nana by myself.  She told an aid that I was her niece, I corrected her gently, I am her granddaughter.

I pushed her around, forgot to bring her sunglasses when I took her outside, had to take her back inside to get the sunglasses.  I got told an immense amount of times to back up, that I was going the wrong way.

And can I just say for a second, they have her in a special chair to make her more comfortable, it is a beast to push around.  Good thing I workout.

At the end of the visit, I told her I would be back tomorrow, and that I would bring her ice cream from Kimball's.  Knowing full well that she would want maple walnut, I asked her what kind she wanted.  "Pepperoni" she declared. UMMMMM. After some clarification, ice cream Nana, not pizza, it was determined that maple walnut would be best.

Then of course I felt the need to check with the nurse, could Nana have ice cream?  Yes, she can have whatever she want's apparently.  

For all that it is hard to see someone you love declining like this, and for all that it is sometimes a little nerve wracking not knowing what the future holds, I am glad I have the time to be here.  I am thankful to be on 5.5 weeks of vacation and able to just completely silence my phone, not worry about work.

I am thankful for God's timing in all of this, that my Aunt doesn't have to be doing this alone.  And that from 1-2:30 today I got to hang out with this face.

Highway Robbery

$51.20
That is how much money I spent on tolls on the way up here.
Seriously.

I was expecting tolls, I mean, I've driven most of these roads before, but really?
Really Pennsylvania turnpike?

I took out $40 in cash before leaving Kentucky, just to be sure I would have enough for the tolls.
Yeah, funny, because I got to the George Washington Bridge and the toll was $12 and I had $4 left.  So there I am, sitting in my truck, counting out quarters and nickels and dimes that I had been saving for the little tolls when I am going from place to place around New England.  I can feel the drivers behind me getting mad.

"Do you have enough?  We can send you a bill if you don't" says the tollbooth lady.
I wanted to yell "I WOULD HAVE ENOUGH IF YOU PEOPLE DIDN'T CHARGE A BILLION DOLLARS TO DRIVE A MILE."
But I didn't, I just gave her my last couple dimes and said "there that's $12."
"Where are you headed?" she asked
"Massachusetts."
"You know there are going to be more tolls right?"

UM yes I do know that, again, I just didn't expect to have to pay $12 to cross a bridge, it seems like last year it was $6.

That is how my day Monday went.  I found an ATM to get more cash.  I made it up to my brother's town, and watched the parade as I walked to find my niece and nephew and sister in law.  I found them just after my brother drove by in his fire truck and the parade was over.  Oh well.

I enjoyed the quick visit with them.  I learned that my nephew's favorite lunch meat is pastrami, really.  My niece informed me that elegant is the fancy word for fancy.

I made it to my Aunt's before the traffic got so heavy it slowed down.  Arwen and her sister popped in for a quick visit on their way from Boston where they were visiting their grandfather in the hospital.

I was exhausted.  I was thankful to be in close enough proximity to so many important people to me that I could see them all in one day.  But all I could really think about was that I really need EZ pass, but should really wait until I have switched to a bank account and have a permanent address up here.  Oh EZ pass, I look forward to your presence in my life.

Where to after the jump?

Recently while talking with the girls in my Monday night Bible study back in Kentucky, I said that I had courage to step out in faith and trust God, partly because God is trustworthy, and partly because I had courageous friends who went before me.

I had the opportunity over Memorial Day weekend to spend some time with some of those friends.

I've known these friends since my freshman year of college.  She was in my Bible study, he was the cook at camp my first summer there.  They met and fell in love, that is it's own story.

They were living the typical American "dream" working, working, paying for the house, raising the kids, working.  Then God began to direct them in other ways.

They sold their house.

They moved to Spain for 6 months.

Then they ended up north of Philly.

I hadn't seen them since their now 8 year old daughter was just days old.  When I realized that it would be a perfect place to stop and visit on my road trip, I was excited.

It was such a blessing to hang out with them, catch up on life, meet their 3 kids, and mostly hear where God is leading them.

It is so amazing to see a couple who said they would go where He sends them, pick up, and actually go where He is sending them, no road map, no agenda, no master plan.

For now He isn't sending them to a hut in Africa.  For now He has sent them to a missions headquarters where he uses his culinary skills and degree to cook for missionaries about to go out to the field, and those who have given their lives overseas and now need a place to be.

And of course we did some hiking, and eating, and otherwise had fun times.

I don't know what you think, but I think water guns seem like the best way to water the garden.

One thing I really appreciated was the total lack of need to pursue stuff.  No need to eat out, or buy fancy things.  These are people who I know enjoy nice clothes, good food, but they have chosen to leave that behind.  It's not that they don't still enjoy those things, but they are committed to something greater.

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Another really exciting part of this visit was a side visit out to Lancaster, PA where we were able to meet up with 3 special college girls.  The middle one was a camper in my cabin 12 years ago, she was 7.  It was amazing to chat with them, to hear what God is doing in their lives.

We heard about a recent trip to Uganda! And then of course we went to eat at a restaurant with dutch food and an Amish buggy.

.I loved the lack of awkwardness that sometimes comes when you see friends you haven't seen in a really long time.  I loved the conversations that left me with lots to think about.  I loved watching wheels turn in his head as he thought of guys he could set me up with.  I love that she takes pride in her clean vehicle (no small feat with small kids, I know) and spends lots of time focusing on the ways she can encourage her husband and kids.

I am so thankful that my community includes people whose lives look very different than me, and yet we find common ground in Christ.  I love that we have been able to mostly keep up with each others lives via technology over the years.  What a great weekend.

Somewhere In Between

I spent Friday May 25, 2012 driving and driving and driving.
I listened to some pods casts.  I learned more about the paleo diet, and was reminded of how much I love exercise physiology.  I know, I am a total freak.
I listened to some Dave Ramsey and learned more about financial planning.

I listened to some good tunes.

I listened to Boundless podcasts.

I am pretty sure I passed every single state trooper in Ohio.

I stopped at a Subway in Ohio where they didn't know how to ring up a salad.  True story folks.

I noticed these in the western part of Pennsylvania

I then passed multiple billboards about saving Pennsylvania coal.

I then passed a small field of solar panels, quickly followed by more billboards about Pennsylvania coal, followed by a billboard about Pennsylvania wind energy.  I don't know what you think, but I think there is a battle going on about how Pennsylvania should be powered.

I stopped at a rest stop in Pennsylvania where they had these...

I resisted the temptation to relive my high school days, for the sake of paleo and my disappearing eczema.
I did pay $5 for a coffee instead.

Another interesting observation, every single time I have driven through Pennsylvania, the following song has come on the radio.  Every time.

Last day in Kentucky

I woke up one last time in the ridiculously early morning to run with my running buddy and friend Jen.  We have been running early in the morning for several years, and talking about life.

After saying goodbye to a few people and running a few last errands, I hit the road for a short 4 hour drive to Louisville.
I had decided that before leaving the state, I should probably stop by Churchill Downs.

I watched them bring the horses out to the post.

And then I watched a race...

It wasn't a very close race...

I was really more impressed with the grounds than with the actual horse racing... And yes I know, the Derby is not like just a random day at the race track...

The last stop of the day was at my old road roomie Sarah's.  I stayed with her family.  It was so good to see them, I will miss them, I am so thankful for Sarah, I am amazed at her faith and commitment to serving the Lord.  I will miss her.

All in all it was a good day.  I will miss some amazing friends in Kentucky, but I am looking forward to the things God has next for me.

Slow and Gradual

Last fall, when I knew I was planning on moving in the next 12 months, I asked a friend who had recently relocated from the east coast to Michigan what she thought she had done well, and what she would have changed about the transition.
She said she wished she and her husband had told people sooner that they were planning on moving.  She said that because they waited until the move was just weeks away, they didn't get to have quality goodbyes with people.  She told me that people take the news in a variety of ways, some people were happy for them, some people were sad, some people were downright mad.  She told me that by the time people had gotten over their initial reactions, it was too late to have a good goodbye, they had already gone.  Her advice was to go ahead and start telling people, even though I didn't know what my time frame would be.

I thought long and hard about her advice.  Then I took it, I slowly started telling people around me that my plan was to be relocated to New England by the end of June.  That was back in September and October.  She was right, some people were excited for me, some people gave me the cold shoulder for a time.

Over the last few weeks though, I have had the opportunity to say quality goodbyes.  I haven't been rushed.  I've had going away meals with people, I've had time to stop by various offices that I have worked with over the years, to say goodbye.

Because my house sold and I moved everything into storage back in February, I haven't had to juggle the details of moving out with saying goodbye.

I am incredibly thankful for that wise advice.

This morning as I drive off, there are a few people I wish I would have had time to see one last time, but for the most part I am incredibly thankful for the amazing relationships I've made in this place.  I am looking forward to maintaining several of them.

House 3, the last place in Murray

For the last 12 days of my time in Murray, I borrowed a room from the sister/roommate of one of the girls in my Bible study.  She had left for the summer and so I was able to use her space as a staging and repacking and sleeping area for my last days here.  It has been a time of hanging out with friends, quiet times with the Lord, and getting back on track with the paleo.  Maintaining the paleo diet was somewhat hard while living in limbo over the last several weeks.  It also put me back on the same road I lived on when I first moved here 7 years ago.
Again, I am grateful for the generosity of friends.

One thing I realized this last week is that there is no way I could have done this year the way it has been had I been married and with kids.  The moving from one place to another, living somewhat out of my truck, staying with friends in a spare room would not have been possible had I been responsible for other beings.

So today I am thankful for the many friends who have been there for me in one way of another over the last year, and for the gift of singleness which has allowed for this time.

House 2

After staying at house 1 for 3 months, it was time for me to move on.  I spent the weekend with friends at their house on the lake.

I had a restful weekend which consisted of the following:
sitting outside reading
sitting inside reading
canoeing in a light drizzle
sleeping
watching documentaries




On Saturday a friend came out and we went to Belews

We also stopped by a fun gift shop on the way home.

Then on Sunday, another friend came out (to her parents house, where I was staying)

We ate an awesome meal, sat on the dock, and watched her dog

It was restful, encouraging, fun weekend. I am thankful for that time.

House 1

I officially moved into this house on Feb 17, though I slept here and was living in between my house and this house for a week or so before that.

Living in this house

and with these people

has shed light on the busyness that was my life.  I have realized that my life was so scheduled and rigid, and over planned.  It has been really a good realization.

I have shared meals with this family, played bocce on Sunday afternoons, joined them for their small group meetings, laughed, talked, pinned on pinterest...

Everyday when I left the house, even if it was 5 in the morning, there is someone up, reminding me to have a great day.

We have used my truck to haul dirt and a canoe.

We have traded vehicles for the weekend.

They have let me take over their dining area for sewing projects.

It was the first stop on this journey and I am grateful for the hospitality and place to stay for about 3 months.

Keep The Old

This morning, as I was leaving the pool, I ran into on older gentleman who used to coach here and who occasionally comes by our offices to chat.  He also comes by when he has hurt himself, which is why several years ago, I had the opportunity to tell him that he had completely ruptured his Achilles tendon pushing his stalled out car back into his driveway.  We laugh about it now.

He isn't someone I see regularly, so this morning when I saw him, I realized he probably didn't know that I am leaving.  I told him, he was happy for me.

He told me that I might be leaving this small west Kentucky town, but that this town will always be a part of me, and he is right.  Every place I have ever lived, whether it was good or bad, is now a part of me.

We started reminiscing about some of the funny things that have happened.

We laughed about my first week here when I was in the athletic training room by myself and another elderly gentleman came down looking for my boss.  I couldn't understand a word the man was saying except that it had something to do with shrimp, and the gentleman's great toe had clearly been smashed.  (I later found out, through an "interpreter", that a large block of frozen shrimp had fallen out of the freezer and landed on his toe.)

That same afternoon I met our old team physician, I couldn't understand a word he said either, but he taught me how to drill a hole in toenails using a paperclip.  It's a very useful skill.

I'm at the point where I know that when I see people, whether it be planned or not, it may be the last time I see them before I leave.

While it makes me a little sad, it has been a good reminder of some of the amazing people I have met in the last 7 years.  It was fun to reminisce this morning and think about all the crazy stories about this place that people just simply won't believe when I am living somewhere in New England.

There have been so many amazing friends, coworkers, students, and student athletes that I am thankful to have in my life.  I will miss them, and hope many of them will remain a part of my life and follow through on their promises to come visit!